Sunday, October 29, 2006


My house is being renovated and Oh My God the noise! I was woken up abruptly at around 9.30am. Which is wayyyy early for me. All those drilling, hammering, and god-knows-what-else, you know what kind of noise they emit right? Yeah, imagine that 100 times louder cos I was practically behind the walls that were violently enveloped by shock waves. It was like sleeping in an amplifier. Only worse. I could even feel the floor vibrating, damnit. Which ended up in my waking up with uncontrollable spasms. Ugh, the trauma.

Somehow, I'm just not quite comfortable with changes. I'm the kind of person that prefers settling in her comfort zone. Wouldn't it be great if we're SIMians and everything could be changed with just a click of the mouse?

The noise totally wrecked my mood to study. So this couple of days I've practically been slacking off. Hence, this renovation can be an excuse for my failure in the exams. Yeah right...

Friday, October 27, 2006

Blue Skies

Oh oh! The sky is soooo blue today! The sun is shining bright! Albeit just now it rained a lil... But it's still very tempting!

I feel I should be in a vast meadow somewhere, wearing some girly fluffy dress, prancing around in its lush greenness, chasing butterflies, giggling like an innocent schoolgirl (wait I AM a schoolgirl, but innocent? hmm..) ....

and sleeping on the soft green carpet when I get tired. Ahhh... that would be life!

Too bad, here I am stuck at home and dancing only in my mind. Pathetic betul.

Quote viewtru (about blue skies) :"A gift of nature, which many take for granted, fills my life with awesomeness."

Feeling Royal

My stomach was in pain, and I ran to upstairs toilet wondering who put laxative in my food (a common thought for me in times of an emergency like this). Sitting on the toilet seat doing my "soothing" business (it wasn't exactly soothing, I was in pain and I swear my anus was ripped open)... err, back to my point.

The artificial orange light (toilet light) and natural sunlight came together, casting multicolour streaks of light by the window. The unlikely camaraderie made the toilet look pristine, clean for a change. For a moment, I felt I was basking in the gentle sunlight.

I looked around, suddenly feeling quite tiny in the toilet. In my mind's eye, I was in a mansion or castle with the ceiling wayyy up high and intricate designs decorated it. There even hung a spectacular chandelier.

Wooh, I felt ROYAL. There I was, a royal descendant sitting on my royal throne doing my superior "royal business". The reflective floor caught my eye and I smiled. Who knew having diarrhoea would be so liberating, eh?

Thursday, October 26, 2006


Ooooooo... that day I had fun messing around with my template. It's equivalent to having a Barbie doll and loads of mini clothes, getting to mix and match to your heart's content. So much fun!!! But I don't think I did a very good job... since it was during the wee hours of morning and my conscience was nagging.

Yesterday, or rather today (around 3 am) I was spending my time drawing instead of studying. Great! Way to go! Wohoo! Sigh, when will I ever learn?

And before I slept, I kinda came to the conclusion that the only 1As I'm gonna get in SPM is for English, Modern Maths and Chemistry...

Cannot like that! Must be positive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006


I feel like rambling today. I think I'm addicted to blog-hopping. Totally OBSESSED. I'm like, checking on blogs every single minute. Crossing my fingers and hoping that people will update. And when they don't, I click on random links on their site, just to find something interesting to read. Sheesh. Cannot like that..... must concentrate! Must study! Arghh... update la you people!!

I wish this restlessness will pass, fast. Is there any way to obtain 24-hour attentiveness? I'm so failing at studying my ass off. If my SPM results suck, I'll probably feel guilty and cry my ass off cos I know that I didn't try my best.

And OH MY GOD, I have cellu-freaking-lite! I'm like what, 16?! Only 16 and already have cellulite? What the heck! These ripples on my thighs were there before, I just chose to ignore it (probably in denial) But now, there's no point in running away from the truth anymore. It's horrifying! My sedentary lifestyle has taken its toll on my body. Next, I'm gonna discover that 95% of my arteries are clogged. Anytime now... anytime now...

After SPM, I have to get off my ass and exercise like there's no tomorrow! No more lame excuses! And boy do I have a huge ass or what! *peers at humongous blocks of grease behind* I'll have a hard time lugging my baggage to the front door, even. Sigh...

Must study! Must concentrate! Must study! Must concentrate! Must... study.... must.. concen... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Friday, October 20, 2006


Wednesday, I had my first encounter with a drunkard! The 4 of us went for lunch at Petaling Street. When we sat down, A sensed something was wrong at the next table. The guy kept on staring at C. I was the last one to know, as usual (cos I'm slow and unobservant liddat). So we moved closer together, as far away from him as possible.

And then he started ranting loudly:"You all don't have to be scared! I will protect you! I'm (insert sth) God! Hahahaha!" WTF ar... during our meal we were scared out of our shits and pissed in our pants. The latter is not true, of course. He asked:"Do you want to go to heaven with me? I'll bring you to heaven!" and other shits,"Study hard! I love you!" "I wont bring you to heaven, don't worry... I'll only bring those who betrayed me...." etc.

Luckily he wasn't violent. He was practically harmless. But still we were scared and C was grabbing my thigh relentlessly. Somehow, I had this faint urge to just punch him in the face or slap him senseless. "Get a grip on yourself! Stop bothering us!" If I were PMS-ing, my hormones surely would have drove me to do that. At the same time, I kinda pitied him. I was wondering what kind of turmoil did he experience.

He left before we finished our meal. He had a hand luggage with him. My friend, B said that he looked as if he was gonna commit suicide! When I thought abt it, yeah.. it pretty much looked like that right? And I linked it to that Spiderman comic strip when Peter Parker mistook someone else's bag for his. That guy wanted to commit suicide eh! Perhaps the drunkard had a newspaper in his luggage too? Just like in the comic strip!

Pffftt.. what am I rambling abt. This was probably my first encounter with a drunkard or anyone emotionally disturbed. BUT it really pales in comparison with other incidents our friends experienced. The same day at a cafe, they met a pervert who was staring and smiling at them lecherously while gyrating his groin! Or sth obscene like that la, I was not at the scene ma... The worst incident happened to another friend! Somebody flashed on the bus eh! Ewwwww... why are there so many pervs around? I'm lucky in the sense that I've never met one.. hey wait a min! I have!

I met a hamsup old ah pek twice! It was probably the same guy. The first time, he kinda walked past me and touched my hand from the elbow down. That time I thought it was just an accident, maybe he accidentally bumped into me liddat. But the second time! That sei hamsup lou tried to touch my thigh while walking past me again!! Fucker! It was only a light touch and the fucker really can walk fast! By the time I realised what had happened, he was already quite far away crossing the street! I looked back and realised in horror, OMG ah pek again! Must be the same jerk! What the hell does he do? Walk abt everyday preying on innocent schoolgirls? That's so sick and twisted! MCH! I hope he's already dead by now! Hmph!

Friday, October 13, 2006

I is a speck of dust

Lately, I don't know why but I've been feeling sentimental and all that. Yesterday, there I was on my bed trying to sleep. Then, I remembered a magazine article about ways to sharpen your mind. One of them was try to randomly choose a year and think back on any interesting events that happened, before going to bed. Ok, I thought, easy enough, let's try that.

So, I chose 6 years ago, when I was in Standard 5. Then I started to get all nostalgic, you know, because honestly Standard 5 was one of my best years, I guess. At least that's what I think. That year was a good year..... I was reminiscing on my admirers.... hahahaha.... damn, I was popular! Ok, end gloating. And then, MCH I went waaayyy back to kindergarten, and tried to remember anything during those years as well. That was totally uncalled for. Why the heck did I do that? The article only stated ONE year.

Sheesh. From kindergarten I went on to Std 1, 2, 3 and so on and so on. At least I TRIED to recall events, but seeing that I don't have a sharp memory... vague scenes just appeared in my (blank) head. Gosh, I realised that I was so totally freaking shy. That may have improved a lil bit over the years. But I'm still quite shy eh. Some events were hilarious, some embarassing, it was like a slideshow in my head.

I wished that I could start over. Numerous "If only"s pranced about in my head, teasing me endlessly. 'If only I was more daring' 'If only I wasn't so shy' 'If only I was a born leader' etc. And that was the moment that tears welled up in my eyes. The bitter-sour feeling deep down my throat lingered. But tears didn't flow. I was a bit confused. I didn't get why I felt like crying. It was just so sudden. I was like,"OMG, WTF, where did these tears come from?"

It was probably caused by regrets. Regrets that the whole 16 years of my life had been NOTHING. There were no precious memories, nothing worth mentioning at all. Like, what did I DO all those past years??! NOTHING!!

In the end, I felt like crap and lost maybe an hour of precious sleep. MCH that stupid article.

*This has been sitting as my draft for over a week now. Lost the mood to blog abt it liao.