Saturday, May 31, 2008

I have a lot going on in my mind.

And I have nothing going on in my mind.

Is that even possible?

What I'm feeling right now is lying-on-the-bed-silently-weeping-wondering-why-the-tears-ain't-coming-kinda emptiness. You familiar with that feeling?

It's very different from bawling-your-eyes-out-clawing-at-your-heart-cos-it-just-hurts-SO-MUCH sensation.

The difference is for the latter, the tears come much easier.

Back then I would say what I had was moderate to severe depression. Now, I mean right at this moment, it's just mild depression...? So... that's a good thing right?

Some self-sabotaging part of me wishes that I could go back to those days. Where I had a reason to cry. Or it seemed that I had a valid, indisputable reason.

Yeap, it's one of those days.

One of those days where you just wanna lie somewhere and slowly rot and cease to exist. Cos it wouldn't make a difference anyway. Nobody would even notice.

Ahh, what the heck.

I'll be better.

I think.

No, I will.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Blogging just for the sake of it

The weather was pretty good. Until it began to rain every single day AGAIN. Why oh why can't good things last?

And I'm sneezing like I've inhaled a whole pot of pepper for god-knows-what-reason.

You know the person has no life when he/she talks bout the weather in his/her blog. LOL.

That aside, Click Five's Empty is damn nice! *big wet eyes*


Truth is, I'm a messy cook. And I do mean messy. What may go wrong, goes wrong.

That's why I don't cook you see.

BUT upon laying my eyes on that lone piece of cheese. I knew I had to make full use of it.

So I did.

Think sausages, egg, pepper and cheese.


And I didn't blow up the kitchen! Which is totally promising. Heh.

Maybe there's hope for me after all.

Monday, May 26, 2008

It's The Holidaysssssss

Stumbled upon these.

"One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh no," I said, "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but decided to go home instead."

"The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face."

"When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns."

WTF. When/How/Why do people come up with these stuffs. Lol.

Note: Stumbling is such a time filler!!!!!
My MSN excerpt:

"I have no life whatsoever.

But who cares since it's the holidayssssss!!!!!!!!!

I can be lifeless and no one needs to give a fuck about it!"

Wise words wise words...

Ahhhh... bliss...
I don't get these creatures called human beings. They want something, then when they have it, they want to return to the old times. Very wtf one lor.

Like, when they were small and stripped of the "power" to make decisions, act on their own will, all they wanted to do was grow up.
But when they do, when they finally do, after so much pain and aches and confusion, all they want is to jump into a swirl of time portal and go back to childhood. Days of seemingly no worries.

But what they don't know is that they'll start wishing to grow up again and the vicious cycle FREAKIN' CONTINUES.

Or when you were busting your ass off for SPM, you were dying for it to be over and done with. Dreaming about college or whatever shit that you planned to do after high school. HOWEVER, when you got into college and got sucked into this whirlpool of endless suckiness, you realised you wouldn't mind taking SPM over and over again if that's what it takes to keep from entering this new life you're in. If that's what it takes to keep from "growing up".

Why the fuck? Cos people are never content. Cos people always have these fantasies of what the future might hold, and when they reach the destination and it's not what they imagined, they're disillusioned, petrified, shaken, caught off guard. And suddenly what they yearned for so long isn't what they want anymore. Now they just wanna board the first flight back to the past.

If only it were that easy.

P/s: This actually ain't an emo post.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Fuck it. Just fuck it.

I'm gonna give myself 1 minute to blog wtf.

Exam breeds kiasu-ism and staying with hardworking people festers even MORE kiasu-ism.


W. T. F.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Exam Whores

People, I think it's safe to say that we have all become SLAVES.

Slaves to who???

To freaking GRADES. To freaking TEST AND EXAM RESULTS.


By the way I'm like so damn unprepared lor can. Whole day did a little bit only wtf.

Monday, May 05, 2008

More randomness till you can't take it wtf

People, yours truly is finally done with the major stress inducer - Illegally Stressful crap. If you ask me now if I care about my topic at all, I would answer "Hell NO" without hesitation wtf. Seriously.

So, that's over and done with. Now life goes on... with. MORE. STUFF. TO. DO.


I really should be at least holding a pen or pencil and writing some half arsed answer on some crappy paper, but here I am blogging and not forgetting, blog hopping incessantly.

Wasn't that like the longest sentence ever wtf.

And why is there more stuff to do? Mid year papers coming up.

Let me hear y'all say... CRAP!

Can I just skip the exam part and jump straight to the holiday wtf?


Apart from being occupied with SAMANTHA related stuff, my time have been spent... sleeping? Wtf. My life damn boring la I know. No need to remind me ler can.

Suddenly, I'm craving for COLOURS. Vibrant, exciting colours. Randomness again.

Someone says my blog persona and real life persona are like two different identities... LOL. Isit... Perhaps I have some sort of split personality disorder wtf...

What? I have never said I'm normal what right.


15. What do you think is the most important thing in life?
Being content.

20. What is Happiness?
Happiness is being yourself and being content with that.

Yup, couldn't agree more. I share the same sentiments with her.

So I guess I should be reminded time to time to stop bitching lorrr... ehehe. But like that this blog would be dead because it's all about bitching and complaining wtf.

Besides that, someone also wonders how come I've discovered so many blogs. Well, boys and girls, let me impart some wisdom wtf. You need to be skilled ok... in wasting a lot of time blog hopping wtf. Some were discovered by chance, some recommended. So my list of blogs to read have grown gradually over time. You'll get to that stage la people, you just have to be patient and determined. LOL. Don't lah envy my status of professional blog reader...

-_-. Sweat right.

Saturday, May 03, 2008


4.03 pm.

Time doesn't stop.

I like the feeling of typing in my blog. Don't you blog owners think so too?

I swear I'm like the most unproductive person EVERRRR...

Tonnes of homework still untouched.

Ready for some stress relief after Monday people? Who the fuck cares about homework eh...

Ooo I saw someone wearing an MCR T-shirt today and I was filled with envy all I wanted to do was mengganas and rampas his shirt.

Can't wait for mid-term break yo... 2 weeks, very short, but a holiday nonetheless.

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Post Yang Lagi M'sweatkan

So I wanted to blog about this a long time ago.

That perhaps people have been asking the wrong questions.

Instead of asking, "Why am I here?", maybe we should ask, "What should I do to make my presence here worthwhile?" instead.

Instead of asking, "Why did this happen to me?", we should ask......

"Why didn't this happen to someone else?????"

-____-". SWEATNESS again.

Don't mind me. I'm just rambling outta depression again.

Post Yang Teramat M'sweatkan

Sweatness. You know what I did almost right after the previous post?


WTF RIGHT. Beh tahan myself.

But anyway done pamphlet already but that's the only thing I did today. WTF DAMN FAIL RIGHT. T_T"... (Nice right, cry and swt at the same time wtf)

And it was hot and stuffy just now. So, more sweating wtf.

In conclusion, this is a sweat post. Dedicated to my readers. WTF. Not even 3 people lor.

My un-ambitions :
- Accountant
- Educator
- Doctor
- Anything to do with the financial sector
- Lawyer

And I bet, many many more wtf. I'm a stubborn person I guess. It's hard to develop my interest in things I don't give two hoots about. Which is basically... almost everything wtf.

To find out wtf I'm rambling about here, refer to -->this.


Phasing out

You know what I should be starting on my pamphlet but here I am blogging again. Damn fail. Seriously DAMN FAIL.

I'm kinda sleepy right now but I MUST NOT sleep. Cos I'm waiting for the sleepy phase to pass and the zombie phase to kick in wtf. Shall tahan through it? But tempting lar my bed, although it is as hard as a rock wtf... well having slept on it for so many months already I guess that I've gotten used to it. This bed with zero bounciness wth.

There aren't really any breeze tonight. Ya I know nobody gives a fuck but it matters to me cos I'm feeling kinda hot and stuffy now ok. Where's the cooling night wind bebeh???

Sigh sleepy la wtf.