Thursday, September 15, 2011

Personal reinvention

Personal reinvention. Does that sound like something only someone older would partake in? What about the younger generation? Is it possible for us to go on a journey of personal reinvention too?

I imagine that when people think of personal reinvention, it would entail someone who has been in a rut for years, decades even. Someone burnt out and going through the motions day by day, suddenly deciding, “Fuck this shit I’m dealing with this once and for all”.

This would basically mean youngsters would not be qualified for a personal revamp because why would someone so young need to reinvent themselves anyway? Aren’t they IN the process of inventing themselves?

People tend to forget about how they were like when they were younger, about how being on the cusp of adulthood could suck so much. Memories of drowning in the sea of all the uncertainties, the worries the anxiety fade away as the years go by. Many suppress the memory of going through depression at that point in their life.

Truth is when you’re in your twenties, you’ve had enough time to develop some sort of personality and attitude, making you somewhat set in your own ways; yet your inexperience and malleability leaves potential for change.

And that is when the personal reinvention could come in.

I, personally am looking forward to a personal reinvention by way of becoming someone… lighter. Less bogged down by my own thoughts, less self conscious, and more importantly, less subservient. I have been spoon fed and obedient for the majority of my life, and it is really time for a change.

I may be over generalizing here, but I think this is mainly a problem spawning from the Asian culture. Since young, Asian children have been taught to obey and not to question. Obeying meant respect, and respect ranked high in the Asian household curriculum.

On top of that, voicing out in my house would almost always lead to a confrontational climate in my house, thus keeping quiet was pretty much my viable option to stay sane. Years have gone by till I finally realized how much I actually owe myself in thinking for myself and growing on my own.

To be honest I do not have an exact plan on how to go on this journey. All I know is that it is long overdue and it is a learning process. I just hope that I can slowly wean off the overbearing, overprotective hands of my parents and make it on my own, for real this time.

There will be no guidelines or tips here, because at the end of the day aren’t we all just learners? There is no set formula, no definite answer, just us trying our best to make the sense of things.

The romantic notion would see me packing my bags and jetting off to Europe for a self-discovering trip, and maybe I will.

We’ll see where things go.


雅雅 said...

I have been thinking of self reinventing too...Just that I didn't know what should I transformed to. Become lighter? Yeah always my dream to be slimmer lol! And also get away wit the nature of being a worrier..
We have been taught to be obedience since young and when you grow you need to learn to challenge authority! Lol.. I can see your graduation trip will be backpacking around Europe for one month!!

bs said...

yeah... I would like to let go of worldly anxieties and mencapai nirvana haha wtf.. thing is the world and society will always pressure you to conform, to think and act a certain way.. it's like the world is memang like that and you MUST adapt to it.
But why? Why the hell should we? When you come to think of it, human rules can be completely arbitrary, sometimes rules can be there just for the sake of having rules... you yourself should be the one dictating how you should live, you should be the one building your own morals, you should be the one making the choices you make...

Our world is actually such a small place, our problems can be so petty yet we burden ourselves with them... don't know how to say... but at the same time we've to worry bout xian shi stuff also cos eth also needs money.. haih

i'd love to go on a backpacking trip around Europe or U.S. hahaha can anyone sponsor me to go on a gap year??? Aihhh...