Friday, October 16, 2009

Nothing new today. Totally wasted the whole day doing nothing again.

But anyway. Just now I had a tummy ache and the next thing I know shit was blasting out of my a-hole like it was a fire hose and the toilet bowl was a house on fire.

It was the kind of one-off diarrhoea session where you get nauseated and you feel like you're gonna puke any second. And you contemplate, if you really do puke are you gonna do it on the floor? Or are you gonna get off the toilet seat and barf into the bowl like you should, with your unwiped exposed ass hanging in the air like a mofo.

Yeah, it was that kind of crap. Ya get what I mean?

To spare you the suspense, I ended up not puking. These sessions are always riddled with fake forecasts of regurgitation.

But the question of the day is, why doesn't diarrhoea work like barfing? You know, cos as I remember after barfing you instantly feel wayyy better like wow you miraculously recovered from whatever shit you were suffering from. You feel lighter. (Wow maybe I should become bulimic wtf). Anyway I can't remember when was the last time I barfed but I sorta recall after-barfing effects as being that way. Correct me if I'm wrong.

The opposite goes for diarrhoea, cos after the first blast you don't feel instant relief. Oh no. No no no... you feel more pain. More nausea, and maybe a bit dizzy, and to top all that your asshole burns. Oh hell yeah it fucking burns. As though it was a nest of fire ants or something.

And the more you crap the more you feel like 'Oh God I'm gonna die... God help me...'

It'll only be some time after which you'll feel better enough to crawl back to your bed and in my case, go back to trawling the Internet wtf.

With your shithole still burning like nobody's business.

At least that's how it usually goes for me. Maybe it's different for you cos you shit rainbows or something. Holy crap if you do, do share the details!

Damn. I end this post with this note: if only diarrhoea were more like barfing, you know what I mean?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Haha.... Nice theory.