Sunday, October 05, 2008

Beach Session

She sat listening, to the rhythm of waves splashing against the shore. Her eyes were transfixed to the horizon, the darkness that saw no end.

A tap on her shoulder. "Hey... thanks for comin." She needn't look, who else could it be?

"What, how could you know that I wasn't some psychopath with an axe?" He exclaimed.

"Well then I'd be dead by now, wouldn't I? So it wouldn't matter anyway." She rolled her eyes at him.

"Sheesh. You're the one who called me here." Feigning indignation, he sat down beside her.

She smiled. "Heh. Yeah... I guess... I needed someone to talk to." The words came out slowly, while her eyes wandered back to the ocean again.

For a few minutes, there they sat. Inhaling, exhaling.

"Er... miss? Your idea of talking is you looking at the ocean while I'm here trying hard to decipher your telepathic messages?"

"Oh all right, I just wanted some company that's all." She snapped.

He chuckled. "I know... I know..." saying it with a tone meant to pacify a dog. Of course he knew, God knows how many times he has been 'dragged' to one of these late night sessions with her. So of course he knew perfectly well.

Her finger started to trail a line along the white sand. She exhaled loudly. "Y' know, sometimes there's just so much stuff going through my mind, sometimes there's nothing. You ever get that?" Her eyes looked into his questioningly.

"Mostly, it's the latter." He said it matter-of-factly, and smiled.

Ignoring that, she continued. "So many questions that I know have no answers, cos they're stupid questions. With no answers! Like what does it meeean when people say some crap like, live life? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

Oh dear. She's getting into one of her animated heated debate pose again. He thought to himself and laughed.

"For fuck's sake, what're you laughing at?" Her eyebrows were crossed. Then she came into realization, "I started to look like a cartoon again huh." -_-. Bravely, he denied it, "Nooope. Nuh-uh. Not. At. All."

More eye rolling from her. She wrapped her arms around her knees to prevent more over enthusiastic movements.

"Every single day, without fail, it's dragging oneself out of bed, going for classes, back home, sleep and repeating the cycle... Man, even zombies have better lives, at least they eat people or something... Even I know I need to get a life, but fuck! I don't even know what "life" is..." She paused for breath. " And later. Later! It'll be dragging oneself off bed, going to work, go home, sleep and repeat. FUCK. That's just fucked up, man, y'know what I mean."

He listened and nodded thoughtfully. "I hear ya, woman." He held his right hand out and showed off his L I F E tattoo on his knuckle. "You wanna know what "life" means? You wanna know it means huh? Well I'll tell ya what it means!"

He crunched his hand into a fist and started, "Life. Is in your hands." He looked at his fist. "Uh.." He closed his left hand on his fist. "See? Your life is in your hands. It's whatever you make of it. What it means is totally up to you, how you mold (uttering the word passionately and deliberately) it. Fuck, it doesn't have a specific meaning, a specific definition! Go to, type in "life" and what do you find? A whole bunch of crap, that's what!"

He looked like a deranged maniac delivering that speech and she couldn't help but laugh out loud. "Jesus. That was.... kinda... corny! Heck the corniest shit that ever came out of your mouth!" They both burst into fits of laughter and collapsed onto the soft, fluffy sand.

"Oh God..." Laying down on the sand and catching her breath, she said, "Then fuck knows what my life means. Worries, responsibilities, being a bore I guess. Sheesh. What bout yours?"

"Mine? I try not to dwell on it. Maybe it's not worth knowing, heh."

"I guess we'll never know the answers... see? Questions with no answers! Shit, we're back to square one..."

They stared at the stars and settled into a long silence.

"Hey, mind if I bombard you with another unanswerable question?"

"Briiing it on, lady! Maybe I have another tattoo to help mah point."

"Fuck! Your knuckle tat didn't prove shit!" She laughed.
"So anyway. Another thing I don't get is when people say they're "searching" for themselves." I sure as hell wanna know how to do that cos I have no idea who or what am I either, so how does one do that ol' wise one?"

"Ah... I think my butt tat can explain on that. Wait a sec." He motioned to unbuckle his belt.

"What? Since when you had your ass permanently scarred?"

He giggled. That old monkey giggle that made him look like a 5 year old. She thumped his arm, "I knew it! Sheesh. Now answer me using your mouth, not your ass. Dumbass."

"Truth is... you can call me dumbass all you want and I still can't answer cos I have no fucking idea too." He finished it in a breath and resigned to his unanswerable fate.

They sighed together. "Well at least we can be clueless together." She finally said. "Yeah..." he agreed. "Something tells me, we're not the only clueless fools."

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