Monday, August 24, 2009

If there's one thing you need to know about me, it's only I am allowed to call myself fat.

You see, when I say I'm fat, it's self realization and admitting to myself that I have indeed gained weight. And flab. It's NOT giving you permission to join in the fun and start calling me fat too. When another person calls you fat, of course you're insulted. There's no other way about it.

You may, however, note that I have gained weight. That I'm chubbier. Political correctness does matter in this case heh.

Again, me call myself fat = Okey dokey. You call me fat = you're basically calling me a pig.

Not only that you're calling me a pig, you're implying your superiority over me cos you're fucking skinny. Well guess what, you have no ass at all. Skinny doesn't count for shit if you're not healthy and fit. Yeah so I'm fat and you're bony, we are basically in the same category = UNFIT.

This is not actually directed to any specific person, I'm just trying to make a point here wtf.

Another thing you can do is, learn from a friend of mine and say that I look better after gaining weight AND say that maybe I should gain more.

HAHAHAHAHA. He could've been the biggest liar around but who cares, there's nothing more ego feeding than being told you can still afford to gain weight wtf.

(But he made the mistake of saying that he looks at my FB pics everyday, which made me go, "Er.... okayyy." That just sounded a teensy bit too stalkerish for me wtf.)

Another little story that I'm just gonna insert cos I wanna. Once at a class gathering, I mentioned to my guy classmate that my normal weight is usually 52-53 kg. He was fucking surprised. Shocked, even. WTF. Obviously I was heavier than him. Dude, that's cos you're so skinny! You're like a boy, not even a guy yet wtf. I could've just crushed him by sitting on him sigh.

Well point of that little anecdote was, don't be fucking surprised when a girl weighs over 50 kg and is heavier than you. Not every girl weighs like 42 kg ok. It doesn't show that I'm heavy, it just shows that you lack muscles wtf.

Anywayyy. Yes, I've gained weight since I came here. But I don't think I'm overweight. My BMI would still come up as being in the normal range. I think. Haha.

It's just that it doesn't bother me much anymore. Although I do have to find a way to cover up all the flab hmm...

Besides, I just LOVE eating too much to give up food for the sake of my waistline. Heck food, other than sleep and the Internet, is my biggest pastime here ok?

To me, growing acceptance of my flab signifies that there's one less thing that I hate about myself. Day by day, I'm just a little more accepting of my cellulite, thunder thighs and spare tyre (yes I know I need to exercise wtf but that's not the point of this post) and the fact that I'm not a petite person. Ah... doesn't that spell personal growth?

So you're asking. If you're so satisfied with your body now, why does it bother you that people call you fat then?

Well, baby steps ok. Baby steps. I may not be 100% satisfied, but I'm trying to get there. No one female is 100% satisfied. Geez, common knowledge people.


Ji Yan said...

LOL these few days i keep thinking of how fat i've gotten since i came here WTF..sigh i dun seem to know how to go on diet anymore wtf.

Malaria Max said...

Fat people are more suspectible to terminal illnesses!